Celebrations

There have been many times in my life when I ask myself if the things I do are just as valuable as everyone else's. Those who know me are aware of my passion to work hard, to stand out, to try to give my best in everything I do. One year ago, I was graduating from college and years before, I used to think that that day was gonna be one of the best of my life, but ironically, it ended being such a blue day. 

What do you do if every single time someone asks you about your birthdays, Christmases or special days, you mostly have bad memories or no memories at all because your loved ones don't consider your achievements as special? What if you think about those days and still feel somehow saddened by that? What if everytime you see someone happily celebrating their birthdays and those special dates I mentioned above, you feel like no one cares about yours? 

I know that one shouldn't live life thinking about pleasing others or doing things for other people's sake. But wouldn't it be nice if someone made you feel special on those days and tell you warm words like "you did well", "you are amazing" or "you were able to overcome this"? I'm gonna turn 25 in less than three months, and I still don't know how it feels to have a surprise party, or how it feels to have your friends coming home to tell you "Happy birthday". I feel like I'm always celebrating others, like I'm always going to other's places to celebrate or spend time, but no one ever comes my way to cheer me up or to say hello when something good happens in my life. However, I hope it can change. I honestly don't want to spend more "special" days at home, alone and staring at the ceiling. 

If you have read everything so far, thank you so much. This is not a happy post but I know some people could feel identified with the feeling I'm trying to describe here. 

L